You may not realize it, but sometimes, a well-intended question or some well-intended advice can be interpreted in a completely wrong way. It’s not what you say, but what people hear. Other times, people are just plain rude and saying things that should never be brought up in a conversation.
There are some sentences that should be avoided in any situation because they can stir up the atmosphere and cause unpleasant and awkward silences. However, if your intentions are good, here are 11 things you should never say to other people if you want to avoid awkward conversations or angry red faces.
31 comments on “11 Things You Should NEVER Say to Anyone”
Very good advice.
Most of this is just “common sense” stuff. I realize many people don’t think there is such a thing any more and maybe they’re right in most cases, but c’mon people!
It reminds me of a scene in the The Office when Dwight asks David Wallace or his wife how much they paid for their house.. Michael Scott scolds Dwight for asking an inappropriate question and then Michael proceeds to ask unironically how many times the couple have sex in an average week or something like that..
One of the blurbs says to “agree politely with the speaker” then inject your own opinion on the matter at hand if you disagree.. Is that not contradictory?
People not saying what they really mean and expecting the listener to read their mind is part of the problem.. Of course we shouldn’t say certain things, but there are ways to say something without being as blunt as a sledge hammer and still possibly getting your point across.. The key is to be as empathetic and diplomatic as the situation warrants..
The crux of the matter is that empathy is maybe not completely dead, but on life support for sure.. If you don’t want someone to comment on your appearance in a negative way, don’t do that to them… Or any subject that you find “touchy” maybe shouldn’t be broached to someone else by you.. Is it THAT complicated?
Re 11 things not to say:
Regarding the use of
”I’m sorry you feel this way”-
Are you suggesting one apologizes when the other is rejecting, attacking or disparaging you?
Example-“I don’t like you and I don’t want to be friends anymore”
I’ve been taught to accept their right to an opinion and that their opinion doesn’t need to be my reality or truth. That’s when it’s appropriate to say,
“ I’m sorry(sad) you feel this way”.
In essence, it’s healthy self talk/care, like
“ I’m rubber you’re glue, your words bounce off me and stick to you. “
Not that I’d retaliate but the first half aligns with the “Sticks n stones may break my bones” philosophy.
Summary: Different types of people and their respective goals/intents require different types of responses and detachment from all.
I hated the “When are you going to retire?” question. People have no idea what your financial situation is. They just assume you have plenty of money stashed away for retirement.
I’m only 5’1″ and people love to point out to me that my daughters are all taller than me. They are 43, 41, and 37 years old, and they have all been taller than me since they were around 12. Why do people feel that they have to remind me of this?
During my performance review a few years ago, my boss asked me when I planned to retire. I was over 65 already. I turned to him and not missing a beat replied “why are you trying to get rid of me”? He backpedaled quickly.
Why are there so many so-called conservative, anti-liberal,anti-woke, “right” folks who don’t believe what’s right in front of their noses ?
Yes, this is really offensive but sometimes someone can help by saying it if they’re a close friend or care. For instance, if someone they like loans a lot of money to someone else and the first person knows they’ll never pay it back and it comes true, I “…told you so…” w/kindness and a warning to not loan money out can be healing but not often. I “…told you so…” can also be followed by a hug and sympathy.
Employers don’t like employees discussing among themselves how much they make because they want them working for as little as possible. The federal wage of $7.25 before deductions; slave wages, hasn’t changed in decades; years. Everyone in America should be paid enough to live middle class but the ruling class and wealthy want them poor so they can be rich.
Yes, it’s no one’s business if anyone doesn’t have; want to have, children. Roe enabled women to control their reproductive process. Not to have children can be a socially responsible choice.
It’s all right to say that if you’re really sorry when someone’s feelings are hurt for instance, if someone else has done it and you witness their suffering. It’s wrong if you or someone else says something really offensive and defend it saying you’re sorry they feel that way.
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